The Wish List

With the Final Season only a week away (!), I figured I'd make a wish list of 23 answers, scenes, etc. that I'd like to see in the final 16 episodes of Lost. I started with what I merely want to see and ended with things that would be homicide-inducing omissions. And just for fun, I threw in some theories and a rating on how likely I thought we'd actually see each "wish" (1 being highly unlikely, 10 being a mortal lock). Here we go -


23) Why wasn't Lapidus flying Flight 815 on September 22, 2004? - When we first meet Frank, we find out that he knew that the wreckage found in the Sunda trench was not actually that of Flight 815. Why? Because he was supposed to fly that plane. Other than Ilana asking if Frank was a "candidate" for some still-unknown office, this is by far the most interesting thing about Frank and the crux of his character. I could see the answer ranging anywhere from “massive conspiracy involving Widmore, Jacob and the crazy guy who repeated the Numbers over and over” to “he just got drunk and overslept”. Likelihood: 5.

22) How did the Dharma Initiative find the Island? - We know they used the Lamp Post station, but how did they know what they were looking for? I’m thinking there has to be some sort of connection between Magnus Hanso – whom the blast-door map tells us was buried on the Island and is suspected to be a part of the Black Rock's crew – and Dharma-financier Alavar Hanso. Was Alavar looking for Magnus and inadvertently found the perfect place to conduct strange research? Possibly. Personal favorite theory - Jacob brought the Dharma Initiative to the Island, infuriating the MIB and leading to the purge and other conflict. Likelihood: 4.

21) Where did the food pallet drop come from? - If the Dharma Initiative was wiped out at least 15 years earlier, why were they still dropping supplies onto the Island in 2004? And why didn't the Losties hear a plane? My theory - A hot-air-balloon pallet drop (maybe Henry Gale?) sent in the 1970s doesn't arrive until 2004 due to the strange time bubble that surrounds the Island. Likelihood: 3.

20) Who was in that cabin in "The Man Behind the Curtain"? - Ben said he's never met Jacob, but there’s plenty of evidence to suggest that he really thought Jacob was in the cabin. Ilana and her crew showed up there looking for a fight, and concluded “somebody” hadn't been there for a long time. So who was really flinging crap around the cabin that day with Ben and Locke? And why did this person need Locke's help? My guess is the MIB, which feeds into my "MIB has been influencing the Others for awhile" theory. Either way, we should get an answer to this. 9.

19) Who's the father of Sun's baby? - I know, I know, "DOC" told us that Jin was the father of yet-to-be-born Ji Yeon. But really, all Juliet could prove was that the baby was conceived on the Island. You know who still could have knocked her up? Michael! This was one of my first theories, and I'm not ready to give up on it just yet. There was always a weird tension between those two, starting when Michael stumbled in on her naked in the jungle and all the way through their reunion on the freighter, when she make a point of telling him she's pregnant. I even heard they cast a baby that was half black/half Asian to play the kid. Alright, I made that up. But until we get them all on Maury for some paternity tests, I will not let this die. Likelihood: 1.

18) Why was Libby in the mental institution? - After the cliffhanger showing Libby in Santa Rosa with Hurley, this might have been my number three mystery behind only the Monster and how Locke was no longer paralyzed. Now it's three years later, and we've only seen Libby once since. She just doesn't seem as important to the story. I don't see how they could work this one into a season that's probably going to be jam-packed with other goodies as it is. Likelihood: 3.

17) The Whispers - Starting with Sayid running through the jungle at the end of "Solitary", the whispers have popped up dozens of times and under a variety of circumstances. Up there with the Blast Door Map as one of the most dissected parts of the show by its most insanely-obsessive fans, they contain little phrases that we have previously heard both on the Island and off, by the deceased and the living. Super creepy. Honestly, this is a mystery I wouldn't mind leaving unsolved. There’s just a lot to noodle about with them on your own. That’s why it’s not higher. But I certainly wouldn't complain if they reveal their source. Likelihood: 5.

16) What happened to Claire and Aaron getting on the helicopter? - Des dangled this outcome in front of Charlie to persuade him to sacrifice himself in the Looking Glass station. Charlie did his part, but the rest never came to fruition. Did Des lie to Charlie? Did he really see something else (like Penny) in his flash that made him decide to finally let Charlie die? Something entirely different? It seems like it would be damn-near impossible for this vision to come true this season, considering Aaron's on the mainland and we haven't seen Claire in two seasons. My favorite oddball explanation - It was actually the MIB or somebody else planting the visions in Des' head, so he wasn't really seeing the future, but instead was being played like the Looking Glass keypad. My gut tells me this was too critical a plot-point for them to completely let go, even if they haven't touched it in two seasons. Likelihood: 6.

15) A Jin and Sun reunion - This relationship does not get the pub it deserves. Maybe the most tragic relationship on the show (Des and Penny being the only competition), these two have seemed destined to be apart since season one. First the distance was emotional, but on the Island that distance became literal and increasingly yawning. It started when Jin left the Island on the raft, leaving a worried and lonely Sun behind. Now 30 years separates them, and it might just take a miracle to bring them back together. Luckily, they’re at a place where miracles happen. Likelihood: 10.

14) How are people on the Island miraculously healed? – “Walkabout” blew our minds by showing a pre-Island Locke confined to a wheelchair, only for him to become a jungle-trekking, hatch-finding, boar hunter after the crash. We know that the Island is selective about whom it heals (Locke, broken leg; Rose, cancer) and doesn’t heal (see Jack, appendix; Ben, spinal tumor), but that doesn’t tell us much. I want more. Crazy theory - People on the Island get sick or heal as a way for the universe to “course-correct” and make sure events play out as they should. For example, Jack appendicitis should have prevented him from leading the Oceanic 6 off the Island. But instead, they left, throwing everything out of whack. I’m sure this collapses closer scrutiny, but it seems cool to me right now. Likelihood: 8.

13) What are the "rules"? - Widmore broke The Rules when Keamy killed Ben's daughter, Alex. The Rules prevent Ben from killing Widmore, and possibly the MIB from killing Jacob. They say that those who leave (or maybe just move?) the Island may never return. Who made these Rules? Why do they apply to certain people? This probably shouldn’t be so high on my list, but I’ve got a boner for anything related to Ben or Jacob so I’m not putting it any lower. Because they involve such critical characters, I think there's a pretty good chance we find out more about them. Likelihood: 7.

12) Kate picks a side - Is it going to be Jack or Sawyer? I think Jack, with “neither” as a dark horse possibility. I've always liked the Kate-Sawyer couple much better for some reason, but either way, I just want some closure here. Otherwise, I'll assume she goes back and forth between them for the rest of her life. Now, that would be a hell of a porno, but I’d rather just get an answer. Likelihood: 8.

11) Adam and Eve - Jack took the black and white stones from these two dead bodies early in season 1 and they have not been mentioned since. The writers say the explanation for them will prove that they knew what they were doing from the beginning. I'm skeptical. Also, I don't really care all that much. It just doesn't seem THAT significant to the overall story. Then again, I wouldn't be surprised if that last sentence claims the title as the dumbest statement I ever write in this blog. Either way, we're getting this answer. 10.

10) What's the deal with Richard Alpert? - How did Jacob make him ageless? How did he arrive on the Island in the first place? Does he see his agelessness as a burden or a gift? I read something the other day hinting at a possible Richard-centric episode coming up this season. I’m salivating already. And the fact that this is only my number 9 wish means we’ve got some seriously juicy stuff coming up. Likelihood: 9.

9) Why do pregnant women die on the Island? - Richard called this a silly problem that was distracting the Others from "more important things". Well, Richard might find it silly, but it's a critical plot point that hasn't been answered yet. Could it have something to do with time travel? The Island seeking revenge for something? My theory - The four-toed statue (which in full form depicts Taweret, the Egyptian goddess of birth) protected pregnant women from some condition that prevented them from giving birth. When it crumbled into only a single foot, that protection vanished, and the pregnancy problem began. Crazier theory – I’ve mentioned this earlier, but it’s good enough to repeat. The fertility problems are a sort of psychosomatic illness experienced by the Island due to the emotional issues/past transgressions of the leader. In this case, the Island kills all babies before they are born because Ben refused to kill baby Alex. Likelihood: 7.

8) The Numbers – Ok, this was a late addition to the list, and here’s why – I don’t think the writers think this is a mystery. I think it’s more like a motif, a reoccurring object/symbol that pops up every so often for more symbolic reasons, similar to all the pre-Island encounters the castaways had with each other. Also, they kind of answered the question of what the Numbers were in something call “The Lost Experience”, an online alternate reality game that took place between seasons 2 and 3. “The Lost Experience” said the Numbers were something called the Valenzetti Equation, and it predicts the number of years and months until humanity wipes itself off the planet. Nevertheless, I still have plenty of questions about them and I don’t think we should have to do some online game to find out the truth. Unfortunately, I don’t like our chances. Likeliness: 3.

7) How many hot dogs can Hurley eat in 10 minutes? - Anyone who can eat 15-year-old crackers and ranch dressing by the gallon could give Joey Chestnut a run for his money. I set the over/under at 40. Likelihood: 1.

6) Walt - I just want to see Walt. Don't even worry about his special-ness. I just want to hear him ask, "How's Vincent?" one more time. But if I'm going to get greedy, why was he "more than [the Others] bargained for"? How does he attract birds like he did in "Special"? Can he really "appear in places he wasn't supposed to be"? And did that have anything to do with Locke seeing Taller Ghost Walt? So many questions. Still, I think Locke didn't ask him to go back for a reason - the Island is done with him. Likeliness: A very hopeful 2.

5) Where is Christian Shephard's body? - Another one of the earlier mysteries that remains an open case even now. We've seen Christian Shephard all over the Island since Jack stumbled upon that open casket in "White Rabbit" - in the jungle, in the cabin, on the freighter, in Dharmaville, down by the donkey wheel - and he looked fairly alive to me. The again, so did Locke. Is he just a manifestation of the Monster? Is he the MIB in a different form? Is he really speaking for Jacob? How can he time travel? Lot of questions go along with this one. Likelihood: 9.

4) Who is Jacob? - This "magnificent man" lay in the background for almost 5 full seasons, known only for his suspicious lists. Where did he live? What was so great about him? Was he even real? Then "The Incident" showed us that he had been visiting our Losties since they were children, always lending them a helping hand at critical times and generally being awesome. And it made perfect sense. But we still don't know how long he's been on the Island, the extent of his powers, or why the Others consider him their leader. Even though it looks like he's dead, the importance of his part in the larger mythology is too great for these answers to die in that fire with him. Likelihood: 10.

3) A showdown between Jack and Christian / Jack and Locke – Wait, you say Christian and Locke are both dead? Well, I don’t care. At his core, Jack’s insecurities – and the guilt, hero complex, and commitment issues that go with them – stem from his father. A Luke/Vader showdown will be the crowing jewel on the final development of his character, and, to me, it seems inevitable. I get a similar feeling about Jack and Locke. Science vs. Faith! I want it! I don't know how, but we'll get it. 10.

2) What is the Monster? – It’s been the biggest mystery of the show ever since we heard those Jurassic Park noises coming from the jungle in the Pilot. The writers have made a point of giving us another piece of the Monster puzzle each time we see it. To this point, we've seen it rip the pilot to shreds, attempt to pull Locke into a hole in the ground, scan the personal history of Mr. Eko, kill Mr. Eko for a lack of repentance, take pictures of Kate and Juliet, charge through New Otherton on Ben's command, drag Montand into the outer wall of the temple, and, finally, judge Ben in the temple. We're getting a pretty straight answer to this question. Two to one odds say it's the Man in Black. 10.

1) Why are the Others on the Island? - The Others are my favorite part of the Lost mythology. There's so much to sink your teeth into with them; I could literally spend hours dissecting this mysterious group of island-dwellers. How long have they been on the Island? Why all the Egyptian symbols? What's the deal with their leadership? The power dynamics there fascinate me to no end. I could deliberate over the strengths and weakness of the Linus administration versus the Widmore/Hawking regime for hours. What about their magic box? Did they really fend off the U.S. Army in the 1950s? Why do they speak Latin? Where did they get the manpower to build that statue? I don’t see a crew of Aldo and Danny Pickett creating such a monstrosity. And you’re telling me they couldn’t come up with a name for the Monster? All those are tangential to the big question – why are they there at all? And I bet the answer to that question lays to rest all those smaller mysteries. I'm hardly going out on a limb here, but I have a feeling it has a lot to do with number 4 on this list. Likelihood: 9.

Enjoy the premiere.

The Seduction of John Locke

To all those who say the writers are making it up as they go along, I cite the opening scene of "Deus Ex Machina". This episode begins with a younger, less-bald John Locke at work at what appears to be a Wal-Mart, explaining the game of Mouse Trap to a small boy. He tells the boy that you start with all the pieces off the board, but slowly you build the trap, patiently waiting for it all the pieces to fall into place and your opponent to land in just the right spot. And when the time is right, you spring the trap. He tells the boy it's his favorite game.

That's the perfect metaphor for John Locke's life on the Island up through Season 5, right? He starts off angry and alone, a truly pathetic man in every sense of the word. Then Abaddon put that walkabout idea in his head. He starts to invest himself in the thought of a "spiritual journey of self-discovery". Instead of going on his walkabout, he lands on the Island, where he's gifted with the ability to walk. He meets the smoke monster, looks into the eye of the Island, and what he sees is beautiful (even though what everyone else sees horrifies them). And then the dreams start. These dreams, more than anything else, feed Locke's need to feel special. They lead him right where he wants to go and convince him of the importance of his quest, that he's the chosen one. Locke proceeds to believe whatever he thinks the Island tells him, whether that means killing Naomi, moving the Island, or sacrificing himself. By the time the Island starts skipping in time, all the pieces are in place. He's going to land on that wheel of cheese.

The Man in Black set up this whole trap, and Locke couldn't see it. He was the perfect target: an extremely needy man who wanted to be loved - to be special - more than anything else in the world. The Island put the pieces on the board by giving him his legs back, then let that wheel of cheese dangle right in front of his nose, guiding him right below the cage with the dreams, "Help me", and a lot of other nonsense, until the MIB sprung the trap. Now Locke's dead, Jacob's dead, and the Island might be exploded. Not good times. Take a lesson from your favorite game, John.